Saturday, 29 September 2007


Serves me right for being excited. Woke up feeling decidedly rough. A little bit achy, rough throat, sniffle, sneezing. Generally pissed-off. Ate quite a bit last night and didn't drink thinking: I'm off to do a 9 mile run tomorrow this is both excellent fuel and I'll burn it off.

Whilst I'm not "ill" I'm pretty usre that a long run would weaken the defences a bit too much. I'll try for a sensible day with lots of vitamins and rest. (Not that, that will stop me from being a grumpy bugger.) At least I can fit in a long run next week ...

And my new sports bra didn't arrive.
And I've got to go into town and do lots of pissy little chores.
Boo Hiss to today.

Friday, 28 September 2007

What is wrong with me.

It's 11.46pm and I'm excited about my 'big run' tomorrow. I mean, WTF. I must be a crazeeeee.

Went out for a lovely dinner at The Doll's House with Tigger and Tom - ate too much (which has been a bit of a running theme this week) and my steak was boggin'. I've finally got to bite the bullet and admit that I only like fillet (damn me and liking expensive stuff) and only when I've under-cooked it to my liking (think raw with a bit of colour on the outside - for show).

Ah well, nevermind. Yesterday evening did a lovely 5k in the gym. All at 1% on the machine (shudder) and managed a respectable 29.30. Unfortunately afterwards I thought I was going to hurl (this never happens to me) - had to go and sit in the loos until it passed. Then did all the weights as usual. But, at the end of that too I felt chunder-some. I might have been working REALLY hard but I think it had more to do with my afternoon choice of food: bagel saurkraut cheese etc think this was not good for digestion. Luckily TheO was super sweet, drove me home and made me a simple veggie pasta dinner. Bless.

The plan for tomorrow is a nice big run - about 9 miles - on a new route. Start with 3 hard miles with quite a bit of uphill. Then an incredible downhill stretch - a few small rises, but mostly just flat and down. I can't wait. Might be able to try my new sports bra out if it arrives in time - the famed Enell.

Wish me luck.

Tuesday, 25 September 2007


Several friends do Aqua-Fit on a weekly basis in Edinburgh. Today we two gave it a go.
Overall - not bad. Feels as good as a gym session but not like a run or a proper swim. We will go again (might adjust this if I awake in pain tomorrow) and add it in as an additional session in the week. Great location in the dive pool in Dundee - plenty of space and good deep water.

I was a bit of an exercise snob about it. I'm never that convinced by something I can't measure. I could go regularly and not really know if, it was getting any easier/I was getting any better. I found somethings tricky from a balance and co-ordination point of view but it didn't feel like that hard a workout. Good to be forced to keep going through it all with music and a teacher though. Bizarrely I got two rubbing patches on my arms from my swimming costume and the constant arm pumping/swinging motion - who'd a thunk it?

Almost had an argument with TheO as I was possibly unfairly disparaging about people who, "couldn't run 10K". Difficult to express that it's only by holding onto thin shreds of belief in my own physical ability that I manage to aim for faster/stronger/better - and I can only do this by making comparisons. I don't want to be 'quite good for a fat girl' I want to really surprise people with my strength and level of fitness. That's why I want to challenge myself physically. Who would have imagined that aqaufit could have provoked such levels of debate. And we didn't even get onto the fact the instructor was quite cute!

Monday, 24 September 2007

Today - we're all caught up now.

Met Bloom for lunch in St. Andrews, with his Ma which was a delightful. Funny, Civilised. But then we went to the gym and exacted a kind of torture on myself. Two weeks since my last visit and I'm not sure my limbs are going to forgive me. My hip aches like an old woman.

Ran 1mile in 8.24 on 1% gradient. Good.
Did all the weights, was damn hard work.
Then 1 mile on elliptical level 20 (so glutes, hamstrings, calves and quads get a blasting) varying between 1 and 2 resistance ( took 12.30).

Also got lots and lots of work done - about 7 people emailed and new commissions are agreed.
Stood on scales, weight bad but fat % is looking like it is down at my peak 1/2 marathon conditioning. I have been putting the work in - just have to sort out the food now.

Another one bites 30 on the ass. 22nd Sept. 2007

Well, that's how cricketboy would love us to see it. He'd had a bad week, but luckily his girlf high-heels had organised (and I use that word loosely) a wee surprise party, paint-ball and a Thai meal.
He was suitably surprised. I was really excited by the idea of paint-ball. I'd never done it, heard all about the pain though. Well, I was to be quite disappointed. It being a Saturday, everybody and their stag party/school outing/birthday celebrants were there. It was 40 a side teams, hideous cheating and no strategy. Hmmph. I did manage never to get shot which pleased me more than it should have done. I was even in the last stronghold of a few games so that was quite cool. Glad I didn't get hit, the bruises are NASTY.

Great meal in the evening I really like the company of RF and Wheeler - think we might have bored high-heels at times but she was knackered so may just have been drifting anyway.

Sunday was spent at home - doing nothing - it was just what was needed.
Seriously this might have been my dullest post ever. I'll come back to form soon.

10K again. 21st September 2007

Slow as ... 1.07.11 for 6.2 miles (about 71 seconds of stops - for 7 cars/tractors etc)

Felt great - really good stamina even if the speed wasn't up to much; looks like the walks on Skye actually helped. Just spending 4-5 hours solidly walking has given me a real endurance boost.

Saw my first conkers of the year - Autumn is officially knocking.


avg 10.49
best 08.02
calories 848 -mmmm good

Huge Skye catch up. I'll stop this madness soon.

I'll start where I left off. All those who want a more erudite and fuller description of Skye can find it at TheO's Blog. (There's about 6-7 posts dedicated to it - with piccies.)

Girls came up after we'd had a hard days shopping. Camping is ridiculously expensive when you have to buy the stuff. I now own walking trousers... my only trousers except jeans ... not sure how I feel about this.

Packed KEITH our beloved landrover. Pic from Tiree not Skye but he's a bit shy so can only be shown in profile.
Headed off for the long but pretty drive. Found excellent cake - which is quite frankly the only thing that high-heels needs to be kept in a good mood. Once arrived on the isle we had a lovely short walk to a ruined castle - it was pretty and boggy.
Set up came at Glen Brittle, had the ubiquitous pasta meal, chocolate afters and whiskey chaser - slept fitfully as it was bloody freezing.

We awoke to rain. Lots of rain. Marriedman turned up we drove to Talisker distillery. Left some of us there whilst we sat in The Old Inn: played games, had lunch, played more games. We eventually braved the downpour for a forest walk in the rain for 1h - not bad - not good. Got back to discover all my stuff was pretty sodden - wearing only a few items for the rest of the trip. Mmmm stinky. Bought more sleeping bags from the camp shop where they assured us that it was "dreadful weather" and usually it was "much nicer" - really! SHOCK NEWS: slept well for the first night ever in a tent - BLISSSSS.

Awoke in quite possibly the best mood ever. Had a good 7mile walk; little rivers to ford, lots of bog not too much uphill,enough to be challenging but not too tiring. Lovely chambered cairn at the end. Went to the pub for dinner -ate all 3 courses - stayed late-ish playing cards.
Marriedman was cursed; after so much rain we now had a storm for most of the night - made sleeping hard it was so noisy and freaky. Had to check tent was still attached to terra ferma - bloody un-ferma terra if you ask me.

Walked to the shower block and was greeted by high-heels who said: "Holy Crap"! She then expanded on this comment with the following: "we've all aged 10 years with lack of sleep, I just thought you should have some warning before you looked in the mirror." Nice. She wasn't wrong.

Went to Raasay - bloody brilliant, amazing views of skye - found lunch in wee hotel with v cute puppy - good sarnies and chips. Walked to Hallaig (deserted village) along a lovely cliff path - only 4 mile walk in total - v gentle. Drove all over the island - saw callums road (road made over 10years, by one man, by hand to stop his village being cut off). Made jokes about having a swanky two-island holiday.

Sunshine and showers so rainbows everywhere - the colours were spectacular. Had dinner in the landrover (back at base camp) then a drink at the pub and lots of cards and silly games - loved it. At this point it should be pointed out that it was a 20mile round trip to get from camp to the pub and back! We really loved that pub. Our final night in a tent.

RF made "mess" for brekkie all eggs sausages bacon and ham in a pan and cooked up in one delicious mess. After packing the car again - how did it all ever fit? - we
set off for longest walk yet. 9 miles along cliffs to Macleod's maidens - brilliant lovely walk out but a bit tricky to get a nice rhythm going as we had to keep stopping for slower members. Then we had a 1/2 hour break and saw them (the Maidens, 3 sea stacks) - briefly - as the weather turned and we walked back in the rain for 2 hours - it poured - we were all dripping through when we got back to the car.

Ultimately was seriously pissed off with the walk - it wasn't hard, you didn't need a map and it didn't get the heart rate up, so I didn't get that glow of achievement ... lots of time for little return - nice views though.

Drove to The 3 chimneys, got in they gave us coffee and cake - bless them and we had 2 hours to freshen up and look smart for dinner - we all managed to use as much hot water as we could and returned to dinner much revived. They even put my dress in the drying room for an hour or so - brilliant, didn't have to sit through a soggy dinner. Lived up to every-one of the many thousands of pennies we spent.

Drove home in slightly sleepy mood. Delighted to be back.

Wednesday, 19 September 2007

The Sky in Skye is mostly full of rain.

Back from an amazing 5 day trip with some friends camping on Skye. Had the worst weather ever - rain for most of it, but also a howling gale one night and freezing temperatures. We prevailed, had a brilliant time, walked miles and stayed for our final night in a 5***** establishment with incredible food and service which really blew me away.

However, I"m beyond knackered and will tell all later (possibly with 'photos). This post is just to mention my *search of the month*. Just as random, possibly less flattering than last time.

fat bags
fat arse
fat bags in trainers

These are the ones that really stand out. Let this be a lesson to you all. Fat bags are more popular than I would ever have realised.

Wednesday, 12 September 2007


After many emails my dad arranged to have some wood delivered yesterday afternoon. At 9.50 this morning (before I'd even had my COFFEE) the driver calls up to tell me he's 20min away. I live about 20min from my dad's. BUGGER

After telling TheO quite how pissed off I was - particularly frustrating as there was no one person who could get the full vitriol of my rage (I was at least coherent enough to know it was just 'one of those things'.). I drove to St.Andrews - and waited... and waited. Driver turns up (is v nice and deserves no blame). Then he opens the truck. I look at the wood - there's 3 tons of it. I have to do the same lifting as the driver. They are all long sections that need two people. 45min of solid heavy lifting later we're both dripping with sweat and have aching arms (well, I do). I curse my father (just because he ordered the damn stuff). I would be more understanding about the wood if it wasn't to build a giant train set all around his garden (the family home which I will inherit and have to try and sell on). Talk about obsession.

I digress.

My point, if there ever was one, is that I meant to rest my arms today. They've been having a hard time at the gym recently. Damn lucky for the driver I have been working out though - crikie it was hard work.

But after many other journeys to prepare for our camping trip, walk dogs, get dog vaccinated etc we did really go to the gym despite not really wanting to. I ran 5 miles on the treadmill (never again) in 50min. It was all at 9:20-9.40 pace but I walked for about 3min between 3.5 and 4.5 miles. It was so hot I was dripping in a foul manner. Also, only had powerade with me, so I couldn't splash water over my head to cool down. Was a bit sad at having to walk but I was trying to complete a time faster then I am capable of at present. Loved the work out though and my legs are aching. Feel relatively prepared for Skye - although hill work should probably have played some part.

Tuesday, 11 September 2007

Note to self.

1. Never live somewhere where I have to get up at 4.30 in the morning just to run in a decent temperature. It would just kill me. (Not, in any way, a morning person. And I define morning as anything before 10am.)

2. Never be tempted by the pretty sports bras. Even if they say level 4 "MAX" support. They lie. Large saggy boobs are only allowed industrial strength layers of ugly elastic.

3. Remember to listen to Cat Stevens on a bad day - it will make you smile. Try not to think about the Boyzone and other similarly shit covers.

4. Hold onto the joy of the simple things. Got my first roof-box today (for a girlie camping trip) and it might as well have been my first shiny bike as a small kid. Felt entirely trapped between the excitement of a small child and the practicality of a grown-up.

5. Eat less chocolate - or anything with a massive processed white flour and sugar content. (Even if you love it sooooooooooooo.)

Monday, 10 September 2007

Today was my second gym session in as many days. I’ve been ‘rippin’ it up’ on those weights. No, not really – just plugging away as it only right and British.

Why, why, why does my local gym consider that shutting at 5pm on the w/end is a good idea? I know they’ve probably done their research and know on a cost-per-whatever basis it makes sense. Seems weird though.

Made it in a 4.28pm yesterday then headed to the running machine. Set it to 8.1 mph which should have given me a 7.30 mile. But I forgot about how long it takes to get up to that speed pushing the button – so what I expected to be my fastest mile ever was 7.36 … boo hissss. However, what I did learn from that experience was not ‘how to curtail an obsession with numbers and distances and statistics’ but, ‘to run for 30seconds first and get the machine up to speed’!!! Ah well. The positive side was that I set it to 8.1 and just ran. I didn’t have to tweak it up and down to keep going, I didn’t have to give myself a break – it was brilliant, felt like some kind of speed demon (still sounded like a stream engine stuck in a tunnel).

Today was just lovely. Sunny and we got lots of irritating wee jobs done (now I’ve got a working blind and the mower has been fixed). TheO was also in sparkling mood after a migraine washed them out yesterday. TheO wanted to pop to the gym and, quite frankly, who am I to refuse. Really decided to make it hard work today as I wasn’t going to do any cardio. Set everything 1 (or 2) segments higher and really pushed myself. Hmmm, can’t wait to wake up with that dull ache in my limbs tomorrow. The one that tells me I really did try.

Ridiculously positive mood about my body today. After a long run or a good gym session I always get the feeling I have this amazing body which just happens to be covered in a huge layer of lard. Hmmm, not sure if this is deluded good self image, or just deluded.

With this delusion is in mind. I now look up Athena times for 5K, 10K and Halfs online. Interesting reading, definitely gives me some times to aim for, especially in the shorter races.

Hope everyone has managed to enjoy some belated summer weather over the w/end.

Saturday, 8 September 2007

A better few days.

Ah, it's amazing the difference a bit of sunshine & exercise makes.

On the 5th went to the woods for a 5K run with the littleblackdog.

9.15 - mile
9.33 - mile and a bit
30sec pause as TheO demanded water whilst running in the other direction!!!!!
9.23 - mile and a bit

28.12 total - fastest in ages
Did loads of stretching whilst waiting for TheO. Delighted.
After that a Tesco's trip was bloody marvellous - it's great to know we're going to be home long enough to make some proper food.

Spent all day on the 6th working - but managed to get the item sent off in time. It's incredible how many people call up and ask for a special and meaningful commission which they need for about 5 days time! I'm incapable of saying no. Never mind, they got it, they love it, everyone is happy.

The 7th was a bit of a landmark day.
Despite it being hot hot hot I decided a run into St. Andrews would be marvellous.

Great 5k time but:
at 4.5 miles walked to 4.75
at 5.25 miles walked to 5.5
at 6.5 miles walked to 6.75 just too damn hot - not enough breeze or shade.
Total 7.1

8.41 - flying
10.07 - 28.50 for 5K
11.56 despite walking 1/4 miles still at 50.34 for 5 miles - delighted
11.36 -- 1.04.00 for 10K
1.07 last .1

Decided not to beat myself up about the walking. It still felt like an amazing run. The secret must be all in the nutrition. I had porridge then a bottle of powerade as I set off, 2h after food exactly. At 5miles had a gel (a new kind, the power bar gel ... slightly less disgusting than the SiS stuff, but still a little foul). Then walked another 2 miles to the beach and walked the dogs. Ok, by "walked" I mean "occasionally threw a stick but mostly stood in the cold water reconditioning my feet". Bliss.

Today (8th) we decided that the dogs were going to be clipped for the first time by us (rather than spend the day away from us being traumatised by the professional clipper). It was hilarious. The amount of fur that came off them had to be seen to be believed. They were remarkably calm as we sooo slowly took the fur off. I never thought I'd be spending any time in my life deciding if my dog was going to have a brazillian! We're left with two clipped dogs who are much cooler and more comfortable. Must be about to snow.

*Just arrived this morning is a new sports bra - a Shock Absorber B4490 in mint /slate. Good after trying on - just have to see if it really works during a run. I can't seem to get anything that prevents a bit too much up and down motion. (Use B109 by Shock Absorber and Champion Action Shape at the moment.) Any recommendations gratefully received - I'm a 38 C/D (mostly D).

Tuesday, 4 September 2007

Lardy Arse Fat Bags writes again.

I think the title might give you a suggestion of my mood. (And I'm not even hormonally challenged!)

However, I'll try and catch you up before ranting.
Went away with TheO's brother, and sister-in-law for a 5 day whiskey tour round Scotland. We were fortunate: The sun shone, the roads were quiet, the accommodation and planning put in by TheO made everyone had a wonderful time. I discovered a liking for whiskey - but only the finest single malts, with a good age. (Oh yes, another expensive habit - that's what I really needed.) It was brilliant. Far better than expected and as always those with a desire to read more can find all you need at : Life of a Wastrel.

Whilst we were away I did use my trainers. An heartfelt thank you goes out to the groundsman/woman of Dornoch FC who provided a lovely pitch for me to run round and round in circles to complete my 5k on the 28th. It was 32min of trudging through long grass and enjoying the sun setting over the sea, whilst a huge rainbow formed and the RAF jets flew underneath it. Really quite spectacular. Also had both dogs with me on leads - they behaved impeccably - bless.

As soon as we got home on Friday 31st I had to get out there. We'd done a lot of driving and my body felt antsy. I think it was this copped up feeling that lead to me pushing the pace. It was a hilly route and 5K wizzed passed in 30.17... haven't done that in a while - was delighted.

After such success (hmmphff) I got a little too optimistic. On the 2nd I tired a *new route* which was mostly trail running (damn Runner's World for putting such alien thoughts into my head). I did a good first mile on tarmac then headed off through some woods - up hill; through a field - up hill; then, amazingly, up a hill. There was lots of walking. 2.25 miles in 30min. A good workout but not a fantastic run. I hate trails, I hate not being able to relax and just run, I hate having to look where I'm going, watch my step, avoid branches and puddles. Pah.

This all cumulates in yesterday when with only a little attention from TheO and a cattle prod I was convinced to go for a swim. Indoor, yucky, busy, chlorine, was not quite as bad as I remembered. I slogged through 58 lengths (it would have been 60 but they kicked me out) doing 4 crawl, 2 breast-stroke in manic repetition. There was one pause to adjust goggles at about 10 lengths and a 2min break at 40 lengths when TheO went off to the gym. I was delighted by this as it's the furthest I've swum since I was a kid. (Still feels nothing like a run though.)

But my gloom (apart from being woken-up before I was ready) stems from stepping on the scales. 12st 7lb (175lb for those in the US) - this sucks. Holidays and highdays have lulled me into eating out and eating too much. At my half-marathon lightest I was 12.1 and I maintained 12.2 with relative ease. Now I have another 5 lb to lose again - and for all those in doubt - it pisses me off. I try to regale myself with tales of my strength and continued exercise regime - but I know the extra weight is just fat. DAMN IT.

With apologies to Robert Frost - a rewriting of a runner's favourite.

Whose breads are these - I think I know.
The shop is in the village though.
They will not see me eating here,
To watch my tum fill up with dough.

My little legs must think it queer,
To eat without some hunger near,
Between the lunch and dinner time,
The longest hours of the year.

They give themselves a sturdy shake,
To ask if there is some mistake.
The only other sound's the sweep,
Of crispy crumbs and chocolate flake.

The Mars is lovely, dark and deep,
But I have promises to keep,
And miles to go before I eat,
And miles to go before I eat.