Saturday, 19 April 2008

I am being punished accordingly ...

Oh godhelpme, it's all gone horribly wrong (but more of this later).
First some kind of terrible flash back episode that would really cheese you off if it was your favourite TV show.

10th/
We finally saw the house. Well, we saw the outside. I politely explained to the owner that we didn't really need to come inside. The final straw for TheO was a milk churn with "tits up" scrawled on it at the 'shop' opposite. Oh god.

11th/
We saw the registrar to sort out the nedding. Wow - this meeting really defined the word anticlimax. They seemed to know little and care less. The ceremony we received afterward by email turned me from a very relaxed lesbian into some kind of militant gay activist. (Luckily this only lasted a few hours.) It's all about friendship and as if it's trying not to offend any sensitive straight people who might be present. Red pen has been taken to the service sheet, but edited lowlights include:

I will value your ideas and expressions
I will always talk with you
And share our happy time and our sad times

Once in a lifetime you discover someone
Who stands beside you not over you May I say WTF

The 11th was more outstanding memorable for my fastest ever 10K. 55.28 - how simply delightful. All under 9min/miles! Extremely chuffed at how quick that was. On the treadmill though.

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TheO was away over the w/end doing their massage course so I managed to get lots and lots of work done.
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14th/
We trawled to Glasgow to meet the nephews, sis-in-law and ma-in-law. After a truly spectacularly bad start [We got a flat tyre and had to take Keith (Defender 90) who doesn't fit in any NCP carpark, so we drove round in circles for 40min and ended up with parking tickets anyway.] it was a really lovely day with excellent dim sum at a fab Chinese place on Sauchiehall St. Mmmm, I think I ate my body weight but I didn't care; it was worth it.

15th/
Met Pistol at possibly the best pub ever. The butterfly and pig on Bath Street - the food was brilliant and the atmosphere really makes it. Loved this new discovery. Had a very sociable and delightful time. Excellent chat. If you go - have the mushrooms!!!!!!!!!!!

16th/
It never stops at the moment. We then headed off to Dumfries and Galloway to see yet another house. [Oh, this was after a 4 mile run in Tentsmuir - 37.30.] The drive was really quite nice and it felt a bit like a mini holiday. A holiday in the early 90s if the food, service and hotel were anything to go by! The meal out that night really was terrible - I questioned whether I could eat it, and I'm not really that fussy.

17th/
Saw the house. Nice but too big and in the wrong place. We might have lost each other in many of the strange rooms, cupboards, and staircases. Pretty views of an area that just doesn't offer enough. Spent the next 8 hours meandering across Scotland on the way home. Just as Dumfries and Galloway gets written off completely certain hilly parts of the Borders come back into play.

18th/
Yesterday all I achieved was: only 16.5 (it was meant to be 18) feel like a complete failure.

6 miles at 10min/mil on 2%
6 miles at 10.30 min/mile on 1.5%
1.2 miles at 10.56min/mile on 1%

down to 0% - what a feckin quitter

then played with the speed a lot as I was bored so averaged 10.56 for the following 3.3 miles

Was fine until 16 then just couldn't go on.... 12min/mile was feeling fast
heart rate was around 180 and would not go down despite relaxing and breathing well.

It really hurts my legs - my achillies is very sore on one leg and still hurt today - ice helps a bit.
I'm nowhere near fit enough for a marathon, this realisation sucks.
I don't enjoy this - because it makes me feel weak and like a quitter, I love running halfs as it does the opposite ...

I'm never signing up for another marathon again - at this rate I just want the humiliation to be over.

19th/
Today TheO hightailed it to Edinburgh to go dress hunting with her attendants. I stayed here and worked, it was extremely productive - but surprisingly depressing. I'm having real difficulty dealing with the many things occurring at present. My desire to plan things has vanished and I just want to hide in a corner, all plans seem to stress me out unnaturally. Hoe Hum - it'll all feel better after a good sleep when my ankle doesn't hurt to high hell.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

1) Have some chocolate.

2) I'll have none of this "I'm not fit enough to run a marathon" nonsense. I get how crushing it is to miss a goal, BUT...we're talking by 1.5 miles. It's a bummer, but it's just one of the inevitable dips. It only means that the good 18+ miler is just around the corner. Think about all your other long runs that have been just fine and all the progress you've made over time.

3) If you're not fit enough for a marathon or it proves any sort of humiliation, I will give up chocolate for 3, yes THREE, months. There, it's on record, that's how sure I am! :)

Ruth said...

Oh no, I have infected you with anti-planitis. There is a lot of it around. When did we all get so busy? I have little advice on this, other than to ask for help on the things other people can help with. Unfortunately this does not include running or work :(

Re training: as prof says, there are good runs and bad runs. You fecking well can do a whole marathon. You are way ahead of where I was for my first marathon. OK, you might have to walk a bit towards the end - so what? 90% of marathoners do. (OK, I made up that statistic, but it is a lot).

Plus you did a long run INDOORS which is clearly insane. Why, why would you do that to yourself? Kills your poor little joints with all that repetition. Outdoors only from now on for anything over 8 miles.

SAM said...

I almost rushed to the internet to find out what anti-planitis was - does it affect your achillies? Then I realised. Doh!